


Four Times No One Noticed and One Time Someone Did

by LadyDragonsbane



Series: Sugar and Spice Bingo [6]
Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
Genre: Idiots in Love, Jaskier has a twin brother, Jaskier's father is a jerk, Lambert and Eskel try to be sneaky, M/M, Priscilla and Essi are Jaskier's sisters, Protective Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Roach is a clever girl, Sharing Clothes, Sick Jaskier | Dandelion, Sugar and Spice Witcher Bingo, mention of vomiting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 20:40:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29863758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyDragonsbane/pseuds/LadyDragonsbane
Summary: Jaskier and Geralt was sharing clothes each other's clothes for some time now, has no one really noticed?
Relationships: Eskel/Lambert (The Witcher), Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Series: Sugar and Spice Bingo [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2194740
Kudos: 55
Collections: Sugar and Spice Witcher Bingo





	Four Times No One Noticed and One Time Someone Did

**Author's Note:**

> Hey!  
> I should warn you that English is not my first language.  
> That being said, I'm sorry if there is something very strange.
> 
> Thanks to my beautiful and wonderful beta and best friend Juh.
> 
> Written for the Witcher Sugar and Spice Bingo
> 
> Prompt: Sharing Clothes

**_1 - Soaking wet inn, stolen shirt!_ **

— I told you - Jaskier reminds

Geralt is standing in the middle of the only room left in the inn, not even worthy to be called that, there is only a small bed and a window, no space for a bath and not even a fireplace; the place is almost as humid as it is outside; two buckets catching the small waterfall that drips from the ceiling.

But the weather did not change from one hour to the other , it had been threatening to rain for at least two days, but Geralt had insisted that they didn't need to stop at an inn, that they could stay on the road and get shelter in some cave.

Jaskier had protested vehemently about this, pointing out how they were in a region that barely housed trees, so impossibly there was caves;  Jaskier had complained about the lute getting wet, about his silks spoiling, and finally about Roach's hay and oats being lost; only then Geralt decided to make his way to the nearest village.

Of course, they were caught in the rain halfway through.

— I'm going back down to play in exchange for our wonderful room and the pissed beer we had before going up - Jaskier was saying while getting out of his soaked clothes.

Geralt picked them up and laid them outstretched on the only chair available; he still had dry clothes but doubted that anything in the Bard's backpack had been saved.

— I'll bring us something to eat later - He promised, turning to look at Geralt — You should get some sleep, that damn vampire almost ripped out your throat!

— Fleder - Geralt automatically corrected — I’m fine - Geralt grumbled, going to sit on the narrow bed — I'll sleep on the floor

— Melitele would have to calm me down if I come in here and see your ass in the puddles of water in this broom closet! - Jaskier practically screamed —  Lie down,  you big grumpy Witcher!

Geralt would do as he said, not because he agreed, but because his head seemed to amplify Jaskier's already loud voice even more.

His armor was properly accommodated next to his backpack, in the only dry corner in the room, Jaskier threw a dry shirt to him and before he knew it the Bard was in front of him checking the bandages.

— Well, they're dry, get some sleep Geralt - He asked in a gentle tone, pushing his shoulder slightly

Geralt lay down and let the sound of the Bard's footsteps, and then his singing below, lull him into a meditation.

Jaskier's clothes were all soaked, luckily the innkeeper's daughter offered to dry them in her fireplace for just a few coins.

He picked up the black shirt Geralt was wearing under his armor, it was only slightly damp, and if he felt safe with the strong scent of Geralt hugging him, no one needed to know.

If people are surprised to see a bard dressed in black, none of them say anything, singing and dancing with as much enthusiasm as a crowded inn on a rainy day could manage.

When he had finished his set there was a tray with two bowls of stew and mugs of beer for him and Geralt, and one of his dry nightgowns next to it.

If Geralt could smell Jaskier stuck to his shirt afterwards, it must be just because they slept squeezed into the narrow bed.

__________________ ## __________________ 

**_2 - The Duchess's Birthday Banquet I Have No Idea Who It Is_ **

— No!

— But Geralt, you agreed to go! - Jaskier protested immediately

— No

Jaskier put both hands on his hips, a gesture that got Geralt alert, it was usually something that preceded a lecture, and it really was.

Jaskier talked for at least half an hour, while he finished caring for Geralt's hair and finished it off with a loose braid.

— Are you ready to get out of the water and get dressed for the banquet?

—Yes Jaskier - Geralt grudgingly agreed.

He hated having to go to court with the Bard, it was true that he could eat much better than at any inn he had ever set foot in, and he also had the best drinks and rooms but nobles were always a problem.

— Here my dear Witcher - Jaskier said handing him some folded clothes, black pants that he was almost certain it belonged to him, despite the smell of Jaskier on the fabric, a shirt of a shade of cobalt blue, and a gibbon in the same shade with silver buttons.

Geralt dressed quickly, while watching Jaskier tinker with his hair until it was tousled in a way that looked perfectly natural.

—  These clothes don't itch \- Geralt commented touching the cloth on his chest 

— Of course not - Jaskier agreed smiling

—  New clothes are often itchy \- Geralt added as he turned to stow a dagger in his boot

— Yes, these are not new clothes - Jaskier said before taking the lute and a bag with things for the night — Are you ready? Come on, we can't keep the lovely Duchess waiting!

— Duchess I Have No Idea Who It Is - Geralt grumbles, still pulling the cloth across his chest

— That was extremely rude of you - Jaskier started the lecture — Poor Duchess is not to blame for having had the bad luck of marrying a nobleman so far away!

— Hum

— Do not hum to me! This attitude will change after you have a succulent pheasant thigh on your plate, or even a fish baked in spiced butter! I would kill for one of these right now - He commented as they walked — And a soft mattress! Not this dump we're sleeping on!

The Duchess was a simple woman from what Geralt could tell, she smelled happiness when Jaskier formally introduced himself to her and her husband, both seemed very happy with the Bard.

No invited guests really offended by his presence, and he was sure that one of the Duchess's maids would go with him if he asked.

— I'm having a great time today! - Jaskier said throwing himself next to Geralt at the table, immediately stealing Geralt's beer

— Get yours

— Nonsense, the drink is being served on the other side of the table still - He complained, placing the mug far from the Witcher's reach

— Thief - Geralt grumbled, pushing a plate in his direction — Eat some

If Jaskier noticed that there was a thigh of pheasant and fish roasted in spice butter he said nothing, groaning dramatically before taking small bites.

— Thank you my dear Witcher, but I have a party to cheer up yet!

He returned to his seat among the band, singing and dancing until it was late enough to stop.

Two trays full of skillfully prepared food were carried to the room the Bard had conquered, the hour too late for them to eat in the hall.

If Geralt notices that Jaskier is wearing the cobalt blue shirt under his gibbon the next day, he never said anything.

__________________ ## __________________

**_3 - Lettenhove ohh Lettenhove_ **

— We don't need to go through this town - Jaskier states vehemently

— It's the fastest way, it saves us at least a week - Geralt immediately strikes back, causing Roach to stop — Did you fuck anyone important here?

— You could say that - Jaskier staggered — Please Geralt

— We have no other choice - Geralt strikes back still without moving forward — I can protect you from anything - He asserts with certainty

— Well, don't say I didn't warn you, but please dismount and walk beside me

Geralt doesn't understand why but dismounts, taking Roach by the reins.

It doesn't take long for people to see them and start whispering, barely camouflaged whispers of Viscount, Witcher and other things he doesn't understand.

Geralt leads them off the main road, putting his hand on Jaskier's shoulder in a firm manner.

— What the fuck is going on here?

— You see… Julian Alfred Pankratz is actually the future Viscount of Lettenhove

— Fuck! - Geralt says vehemently

— Yes, I agree... Can we try to be as quick as possible?

— Right - Geralt agrees

He takes off the heavy, padded cloak he is wearing and places it over Jaskier, tying the ties on the collar before nodding, the hood covering most of his face.

They are almost halfway through the city when some armed guards surround them.

— Stop - The older-looking boss says — What is a Witcher doing trying to pass unnoticed through our city? - Question dryly

— Just taking a shortcut, we mean no harm, we're leaving - Geralt replies in a firm tone, his body almost entirely in front of Jaskier

— The Viscount has ordered us to escort you to him, will you cooperate Witcher?

— Please Edmund - Jaskier asks, lowering his hood and standing in front of Geralt — Tell him we were already out of his reach

The man looks surprised, he smells surprised and at the same time happy for Geralt.

— I'm sorry Master Julian, there is more of the guard at the border, we would both be punished for that, you know ... - Edmund the chief of the guard warns him with regret

— All right, looks like we are going to meet my father Geralt - Jaskier says in a tone that tries to sound cheerful

— Hum

But Geralt can feel the anxiety coming off him in waves, along with a mixture of fear and shame that surrounds his scent in a way Geralt hates.

— I brought them just as ordered sir - Edmund says entering the room in front of them

The house they are in is a real mansion, with countless paintings and vases scattered around where, curtains that seem to be made of the same expensive materials as the presentation clothes Jaskier wears.

Geralt can glimpse small pieces of Jaskier in the paintings, as well as the figure of a woman with brown hair and sweet blue eyes, besides Jaskier there are three other children, two younger girls and a boy who seems to be the Bard's age.

—  The good son to home returns, doesn't he, Julian? — The man sitting at the head of the table says dryly

Geralt dislikes him immediately as soon as he sees how Jaskier's body straightens and almost wobbles.

Geralt lets his shoulder rub against the cloak, letting Jaskier know that he was there.

  
  


— Well, just a quick visit my father - Jaskier agrees, nodding — We don't want to take up your precious time, we will resume our trip immediately - He assures us, making an attempt to turn around

— Not so fast, boy! Where are your manners anyway? - The man asks in a cutting tone — And you Witcher, you must be the White Wolf about whom my son has been filling the taverns with his chatter

Jaskier digs his fingers into the cloth, wanting his weight to help him ground himself, he wants to grab onto Geralt's arm and drag him away from there, but can only watch helplessly.

— I'm Geralt of Rivia, Lord Viscount - Geralt says aloud, in a tone that surely surpasses that of the Viscount — Jaskier's music travels all over the continent, his presence is requested in almost every court, he is Queen Calanthe's own favorite Bard - Geralt ends with a half bow

Jaskier doesn't know what to say, he has never seen Geralt so eloquent like that, and annoying his father without any fear.

Geralt looks over at Jaskier, his bard smells happy now, so he was doing everything right.

— Jaskier… - The Viscount practically spits

— Jaskier! - A girl who looks barely fifteen screams as she runs up to him

— Priscilla! - Jaskier answers by opening his arms to her

— Did she say Jaskier? - A male voice asks outside the door — Essi! Come here, Jaskier is home!

Soon Geralt sees his Bard almost swallowed by the three pairs of arms circling him, Geralt wants to swim in the scent of happiness and love that he now emanates.

— You will stay for dinner and you can leave tomorrow — The Viscount declares standing up — Until then I hope my children will have stopped behaving like children.

— Yes father — The four say in unison

After this Geralt finds himself pulled by Jaskier's hand, while his brothers lead him to the farthest room in the house.

— We don't let father get rid of anything — Essi, the little sister counters as she opens the door.

The room seems to scream Jaskier, there are colorful fabrics hanging from the canopy of the bed, pillows that seem softer than a touch of feathers, a large bathtub of silver claws near the fireplace, and a plethora of books and clothes.

— Geralt - Jaskier says as soon as he closes the door behind him — Allow me to introduce my family, Essi my younger sister, Priscila the eldest and my twin brother Jacques - He says touching each of them tenderly on the shoulder

— Twin? - Geralt repeats — Melitele have mercy - Say it truthfully

Jacques bursts into laughter while Jaskier looks indignant.

— I know we don't look alike Sir - Jacques who had blond hair and greenish eyes says in a fun way — And I can guarantee that Jaskier is the worst of us, he is the oldest too - Continues with a mocking smile

— Not a sir - Geralt replies clumsily

The three fill them with questions after that, all sprawled out on the pillows that Jaskier threw on the floor, the Bard himself is almost sprawled out next to Geralt.

They bathe before dinner, which went on without a single word being spoken beyond the "They feel" that the Viscount had said.

— You should remember the place that Julian should occupy — The Viscount says as soon as the dishes are removed — Lettenhove needs a successor

— And you have the best of them in Jacques my father - Jaskier hits back unwillingly

— You don't expect to end your days crawling along a muddy road, do you? - The man replies fiercely

— I have a guaranteed job in Oxenfurt, and a roof over my head

— Oxenfurt will throw you out when you can no longer go downstairs to scream your nonsense

Jaskier seems to have been hit in the face, Geralt lets his thigh touch his under the table before turning to the Viscount.

— Jaskier has a guaranteed sanctuary in the Wolf Fortress, Kaer Morhen, he is a friend of the Witchers and will never be alone as long as one of us lives - He declared in a firm tone

— If I may, my father - Jaskier starts in a more controlled tone — We will retire, we will leave before dawn so forgive us if we don't see each other again — Sisters, Brother - He nods before getting up

Jaskier would never forget the look on his father's face across the table.

— Jaskier, I...

— It was amazing!

— What? - Geralt asks without understanding

— I never saw that face on him! No one has ever faced him except my mother! I'm so glad you're here with me! - Reiterates pulling him into a tight hug — Now, get ready for bed while I spare my dear father some of my old belongings!

Jaskier seems to have taken an injection of cheer, fishing some books off the shelves while humming.

— We can't carry so much weight Jaskier - Geralt reminds him of his position in front of the fireplace

— Yes, of course, I plan to sell most of these books along the way, and I'm getting Pegasus!

— What's Pegasus?

— Jacques's horse, he gave it to me earlier, while you were taking a bath

— Hum… Roach won't like it

— She's a big girl, I'm sure she won't be jealous of me!

Geralt would not tell him the problems that having a horse and mare traveling together would bring, at least not now while he was selecting a large bag of clothes to take with them.

When they lie side by side on the huge bed, Jaskier still curls up on Geralt's heavy cloak, and if the Witcher pulls him to his chest and breathes in his combined scent, no one need to know.

__________________ ## __________________

**_4 - In the middle of the road there was a stone. there was a stone in the middle of the road_ **

— I already told you - Geralt reminds him

— I know, I know! - Jaskier complains in a downcast tone — Look where you're going, stay on the road and keep the damn lute out of trouble - Jaskier recites — But really Geralt, how was I supposed to know that there was a fucking stone right in the middle of the road!

— You should use your eyes - Geralt replies, a half smile on his face.

Jaskier tightens more his arms around Geralt, it was not ideal two grown men riding poor Roach, and not very comfortable either, but the journey would still be long and Geralt wanted them to get to the village soon.

— Geralt, how much further is it?

— A few hours

— Should my foot be blue?

After that Geralt makes Roach hurry, of course it would not be a simple twist, not with this bard.

For some grace of Destiny, the village soon becomes visible.

For some other quirk of Destiny, they have no sorcerer or healer, only an old lady who deals with herbs.

— Are you sure about that?

— I've been doing it my whole life Witcher, now leave the poor boy to me and go do Witcher's things -  The old woman ordered firmly, shooing him away with her hands .

Well, Geralt would have to respect someone who shooed him so vehemently without a drop of fear.

— I'll be back by nightfall, Jaskier - Geralt says after helping him sit down on a chair

— Sure, remember to buy Roach an apple for me! - He asks, tossing him his bag of coins.

When he returns Jaskier is lying on a narrow bed, sweat covering his body and soaking his silk shirt; he seems to be having a great nightmare.

— What have you done to him? - Geralt practically growls at the old woman

— Nothing I wouldn't do for another patient; to put the bone in place I had to give him something to calm him down, sometimes it's bad, sometimes not, he'll be fine tomorrow - The old woman shrugged her shoulders.

Geralt reluctantly pays the old woman, carrying Jaskier over his shoulder to the inn where he got a room.

— Is he okay? - The Innkeeper asks worriedly

— The old woman on the edge of Village - Geralt starts in an irritated tone

— I've seen it -The woman interrupts him — Half of us have already suffered from this, I'll take clean sheets and a bucket to the room, the poor man will vomit his guts out soon - She informed her, turning his back.

Geralt nods, he takes Jaskier upstairs and lays him down on the bed while rummaging through his saddlebags, if the Bard lost another one of his shirts Geralt would not hear the end of it.

Jaskier is still too hot, so Geralt leaves him in just his underwear; in just a few minutes he is shivering.

— Dammit Jaskier - Geralt talks to himself while picking up his nightgown and putting it on the bard

It doesn't take long for a pained groan to leave his throat and his body to project to the side; luckily the innkeeper has already passed by leaving him a bucket.

Geralt watches over him throughout the night, Jaskier seems delirious, calling his name sometimes as a whisper, sometimes as if in a panic.

When dawn comes Geralt asks for a bath, they are both covered in sweat and vomit; Geralt has been covered in worse, and Jaskier has always helped get rid of dirt after a hunt, it is only fair that he should do the same for him.

Jaskier looks much younger when he is sick; Geralt takes him of all his clothes and places him gently in the bathtub.

The foot has deflated and turned from almost blue to a deep shade of purple; at least the old woman had done a clean job and immobilized the limb well.

He quickly bathes Jaskier, washing his hair as Jaskier liked, using lavender oil.

After that he changes the sheets for the clean ones and puts the bard on his black pants, since the fabric of the bard's clothes would wear out in contact with a bandage; and if he puts his own shirt on it, it's just because all the other clothes are dirty.

Geralt takes a quick bath and gets the worst of the dirt out of his clothes before dropping them into another bucket to be washed along with the dirty sheets.

It takes another two days before Jaskier is able to limp around the room on his own, his foot away from any contact with the floor for at least a few weeks, according to Geralt.

If he keeps on Geralt's clothes all the time, they don't talk about it.

___________________ OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO ___________________

**_\+ 1 — Sweet Home Kaer Morhen_ **

— You brought the Bard - Lambert says as Jaskier enters the door behind Geralt

— Being brilliant as always Lambert -  Eskel points out amusing — Hey! - He complains when a nut flies on his head.

— It is a pleasure to meet you - Jaskier says truly, bowing to Vesemir

— Likewise Bard, your songs have made my pups' Path a little better - Vesemir offers along with a small smile

— Better - Lambert murmurs

— Much better - Eskel agrees in the same tone

  
  


Vesemir serves two bowls of boiled vegetables and roasted venison, while Eskel places a mug of beer in front of Jaskier and then extends a bottle to Geralt.

— What is it? - Jaskier asks curiously, trying to pull the bottle from Geralt.

— Poison for humans - Eskel says in an amused tone — Beer does almost nothing for us

It doesn't take long for the heated room to get Jaskier hot, and he removes Geralt's cloak, and then two more layers that he was wearing underneath, leaving only Geralt's black shirt.

Neither of them notice the mischievous glances Eskel and Lambert exchange with each other.

— Geralt, since you didn't tell us you were bringing a guest, we didn't make any preparations - Vesemir told us when they had finished

— I wouldn't want to be a nuisance sir - Jaskier declared immediately

— Only Vesemir is fine, kid, and that's not what I meant - Vesemir replies in a kind tone

— He means that there is only the White Wolf's room - Lambert explains, looking between the two of them mischievously

— No problems, right Geralt? - Jaskier asks turning to him — We share more beds than I can count since we've been traveling together

Eskel can't help but laugh, causing Lambert to follow him and even Vesemir to smile; the tips of Geralt's ears a little more flushed than usual.

———————— ### ———————— 

Jaskier thrives in Kaer Morhen.

Even if he can't do the heavy work of fixing the walls or climbing the roofs, he can still do a lot.

Vesemir sees he going to tend the animals before he can say anything; he tends the chickens, brushes the horses, and feeds Eskel's goats.

Eskel melts when he hears Jaskier talking to his favorite goat, calling her dear girl in a loving tone; he is also surprised to see that Jaskier has taken his place in the kitchen, chopping and peeling vegetables under Vesemir's supervision.

Lambert almost thanks him when the Bard knocks from room to room to get clothes to wash; this was the task Lambert hated doing the most.

None of them comment as they see Jaskier walking around in Geralt's black shirts, sometimes even in the Witcher's pants.

But when they see Geralt leaving his room at dawn in a red shirt they can no longer hold their tongues.

— Nice Bard pants - Lambert says a few days later, when Jaskier shows up with Geralt's sleeping pants

— Thanks, I found some small holes in my clothes, if you have something to fix this is the time Lambert! - Jaskier says while helping himself to a roll

Lambert is flying down the stairs soon after, Eskel's laughter following him.

— This shirt doesn't seem to go very well with your clothes Jaskier - Eskel points out on another day, when Jaskier is cutting vegetables

— So the Witchers have fashion sense, in fact you seem to be the only one around here who seems to think that some color would do you good - Jaskier starts chattering, waving the knife he was using — Red is a color that suits you dear Eskel - keeps smiling

If Eskel runs out of the kitchen with his ears on fire, Geralt is the only one to see.

— Where's Jaskier - Vesemir asks during one night.

They are all settled in front of the fireplace, mugs of mead and beer scattered on the floor among them; Lambert is huddled together with Eskel in a sort of fur nest; Vesemir remains in his worn chair, staring into the fire while his cubs play a game of gwent.

— He went to get some blankets in the room, said he was still cold - Geralt replies from the floor.

He was close to the other two, sitting on a huge cushion that Jaskier had made and filled with the wool from Eskel's goats, it was very comfortable.

— Damn fortress with wind everywhere - Jaskier comes in complaining

— Come here - Geralt commands, opening his arms; his red shirt becoming fully visible

— You don't have a red shirt - Lambert shoots him on the spot

Geralt just continues to stare at him as Jaskier moves closer and sits on his lap, moaning contentedly as he squirms around looking for the ideal position, Geralt's arms tightening around him.

— Jaskier doesn't have black pants either - Eskel comments with an amused smile.

— It so happens, my dear Witchers, that Geralt's clothes are much more comfortable and much warmer than mine - Jaskier clarifies, seeming to bury himself even deeper into Geralt

— And the red shirt is what? - Lambert asks, tilting his head to try to see more

— It's from Jaskier - Geralt replies with a shrug

— Melitele protect us - Vesemir says in an exasperated way — Why don't you just spit it out?

— Since when are you guys fucking? - Lambert asks immediately

Jaskier laughs, and he can feel Geralt smiling at the back of his neck, Eskel smiles in response.

— Since when are you and Eskel? - Jaskier retorts, seeing Lambert look horrified

— You are even less subtle - Geralt remarks watching Eskel's ears turn red

— Now I can finally have peace - Vesemir mumbles taking a sip of his drink

The four remain settled, warmth spreading through their hearts as soft smiles are exchanged.


End file.
